It’s May 17, 2020, just 2 days after the Enhanced Community Quarantine (ECQ) was lifted from my neighborhood. We are now under Modified Enhanced Community Quarantine (MECQ). These lock-downs are declared to slow down the spread of infection of the deadly covid-19 pandemic by stages. Unfortunately, my age condemns me to the group susceptible to catch this wily virus and is therefore barred from straying outdoors. Its good my hair can no longer grow topside but only around the sides and back because I may not be within one meter from a barber's scissors.
But, how things have, indeed, changed world-wide for all humanity. We are entering a new dark normal way of life, not knowing how it will turn out - and how soon.
I have lost touch with my aging buddies—although 71 of us are theoretically still around but may no longer be kicking. A few weeks ago, three of them have marched off in quick succession, Manny Tanjangco, Ed Roceles and Sepoy Severino. And at least 2 others are bedridden.
As I myself live on, hobbling along, approaching my 90s, words of writer Red Smith’s eulogy for a fellow often come to mind: “Dying is no big deal; the least of us will manage it. Living is the trick!”
The immediate trick, as I see it now, is to stay away from doctors and hospitals amid the challenges of the raging pandemic and the ripening to old age.
I find my being locked down at home less of a problem as I have often been staying home even before the onslaught of covid-19 pandemic. I’m convinced I’m at least keeping my immunity at a high level for as long as I keep doing my nightly earthing or grounding routine and my daily intake of five tablespoonfuls of virgin coconut oil — and other food supplementation fairly religiously for over three years now.
If we should be so blessed, we as a couple could best accept the realities of old age together, avoiding cariño brutal, sometimes bickering, sometimes hugging, laughing at ourselves and at each other. Before we get there I’d like to be able to accept our new realities.
That’s exactly what is happening to us, for which we have no way of preparing.
But since we grow old only once, we can at least give the following tips to help the younger generation grow old properly.
1. It's time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don't just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it.
2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren. Don't feel bad for spending your money on yourselves. You've taken care of them all their lives and you've taught them what you could.
3. Keep healthy lives, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking even with a walking cane), eat well, and get your sleep. It's easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy.
4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for you or your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day, one of you will miss the other, when money will no longer provide any comfort. So, enjoy it together.
5. Don't stress over the little things. You've already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present.
6. Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, love your neighbor, and remember: avoid cariño brutal, it may hurt sensitive souls.
7. Be proud, both inside and out. Unless the pandemic restrictions disallow it, don't forget to go to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked.
8. Don't lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your sense of style.
9. Always stay up-to-date. In this digital age, watch the news on TV, go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and sign up to Facebook or a couple of social networks.
10. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism.
11. Never use the phrase: "In my time". As long as you're alive, you are a part of this time. Have fun and enjoy life.
12. Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste being surly.
13. Don't abandon your hobbies. If you don't have any, make new ones.
14. Even if you don't feel like it, socialize and try to accept invitations. Get out of the house when allowed, use digital technology to meet people you haven't seen in a while, experience something new (or something old).
15. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. It perks up the brain. Most seniors go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to.
16. Pain and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try to minimize them in your mind. They are not who you are, they are something that life has added to you. If they become your entire focus, you lose sight of the person you used to be.
17. If you've been offended by someone, forgive them. If you've offended someone, apologize. Forgive, forget and move on with your life.
18. If you have a strong faith, savor it and entrust everything to the Almighty. The key is not to waste your time trying to convince others. They will make their own choices no matter what you tell them, and it will only bring you frustration.
19. Laugh. Laugh out Loud. Laugh at everything. Remember, you are some of the lucky few who are managing to live a long fruitful life.
20. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life you've lived so far.
There's still much to be written, so get busy writing and don't waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!
21. Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren. Filipinos are great for being family oriented. Your children or grandchildren will definitely avoid dumping you to old folks home. But modern condo living is getting to be unavoidable and domestic help is getting scarce. But we all need privacy. If you (heaven forbid) lose your partner, then find some kind soul to care for you and help out. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live alone.
AND REMEMBER: "Life is too short to drink bad wine. And the memories you leave behind will stay well beyond your grave or your urn,"
